Sunday, September 11, 2016

Homemade Pumpkin Puree

  1. Stupidly buy two huge pumpkins
  2. Drag them home and in the house
  3. Cover table with plastic bag, have plenty of towels nearby, and wear old clothes
  4. Gather tools - sharp knives, spoons, buckets, cutting boards, music, drinks
  5. Hack pumpkin in half
  6. Scoop out guts, bare-handed of course
  7. Meticulously separate guts from seeds and save seeds for roasting
  8. Cut flesh into chunks
  9. Use all the foil in your house to wrap these chunks
  10. Throw foil-wrapped chunks into a 425F oven and bake for 45 minutes or until tender
  11. Use a towel to throw the foil packs onto the top of the stove and spill hot pumpkin juice on your leg; then realize its much easier to just take the entire oven rack out and dump the foil packs into the sink
  12. Open foil packets to allow steam to escape
  13. Take hot pumpkin out of foil and back to table
  14. Play hot potato while peeling pumpkin and cutting into smaller chunks
  15. Have someone puree the chunks in a tiny, low-quality blender, taking breaks as needed to avoid burning out the motor
  16. Pour all puree into a big bucket
  17. Try to fit bucket in fridge
  18. Repeat with second pumpkin
  19. Make pumpkin spice flavored everything
  20. Eat pumpkin spice flavored everything!!!!!

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